BOOK REVIEWS: Running on Empty

Running on Empty - Carrie Arnold ©2004, First Page Publications, 185 pages, $14.95

Carrie Arnold’s diary is the personal account of her struggle with anorexia nervosa, with a happier ending than Carol Becker’s from This Mean Disease. This memoir provides an inside view of Carrie’s experience with obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), depression, and anorexia nervosa. While there are many books that show readers an insider’s view of anorexia, what makes this one different is the struggle with OCD. At times, it seems as if that disorder was driving the eating disorder. In fact, Carrie believes that if she would have been diagnosed with OCD in high school and had started taking Prozac that "it is unlikely that the eating disorder would have ever developed" (pg. 34). It is hard to believe that statement, though, when Carrie describes her flirting with an eating disorder beginning in middle school.

In many ways the story is a familiar one. Carrie is a "young, white, female, middle-class, over-achiever…from a close knit family" (pg. 12), missing nothing but a dog and a white picket fence. She is very clearly bright and determined to do well. She tells the story of her eating disorder, her failures to recover, and her reluctance to give up anorexia. Through the epilogue, we learn that Carrie graduated from college and looked toward a future without an eating disorder. However, there is still a sense that she continues to struggle with her body image, food and her weight.

Many similar books like this are out there-—young women telling their eating disorder story. While it probably felt good for Carrie to write this book, like Wasted and others in this genre, I would worry that this kind of book gives readers permission to keep their anorexia. Readers should be cautious that this book may trigger eating disorder behaviors.